1. How is Marriage Prep 101 different from church-based marriage preparation programs?
Marriage Prep 101 is non-religious in content and we are not affiliated with any religious organization. Couples of all faiths and backgrounds are welcome to attend. Instead of relying on a couple’s faith and shared religious values to bolster their relationship, we teach relationship skills to address conflicts, build intimacy and enhance commitment. Couples can always add their own shared spiritual and religious beliefs to augment what we teach. We also welcome couples that are interfaith or non religious.
2. How effective is the Marriage Prep 101 Premarital Counseling Program in preventing divorce?
Nothing can prevent divorce if two people aren’t committed to being together. However, several studies both in United States and in Germany show that certain types of marriage preparation classes–those that teach skills –do lower the divorce rate at the five year mark. One study showed that couples who took a course called PREP reduced their divorce rate by 30%. In another study, different types of marriage prep classes were rated for effectiveness. Again, the skill based programs were deemed more effective than faith-based programs. In general, new research is suggesting that if couples communicate well, learn how to address and resolve conflicts, enhance their commitment while building intimacy and friendship, they will have far fewer reasons to divorce based on surveys of those who do divorce.
3. When is the best time to enroll in the Marriage Prep 101 Premarital Counseling Program?
The best time to take the class is whenever you are most open to learning about your relationship and motivated to work on it. Of course, couples today are very busy–time is among the most challenging issues a couple can face in the first five years of marriage. We find that newlywed couples derive as much benefit to marriage preparation classes as pre-marital couples. However, it is important that you not wait too long because building a healthy relationship requires the very skills that we are teaching.
We also have many couples take Marriage Prep 101 who are seriously dating or pre-engaged. The latest thinking is that there is a “magic window” of opportunity to learn marriage skills–the year before marriage through the first year or two after marriage. Learning and implementing healthy ways of dealing with each other BEFORE the bad habits take root in your relationship is the underlying rationale for the “early is better” thinking.
Throughout the workshop we discuss compatibility, expectations, family of origin/personality, communication, conflict resolution, and intimacy/sexuality. You will have opportunities to listen, learn, write exercises in workbooks, inquire, and have structured dialogues with your partner. The workshop covers a lot of topics in positive, proactive and practical ways. At the end you will create a vision statement or action plan, called a “Marriage Bond.” Also, we welcome questions and comments.
5. What if my partner and I have a particular issue we need help with? Can we get help with it in our sessions?
Many couples have questions about whether it is right for them to get married even after the engagement has been announced and the wedding planning is underway. Our program can help sort out these issues or at least offer some information to help understand them better. This makes a lot of sense because it is best not to proceed until you are both fully committed. Remember that marriage tends to get harder the first few years before it gets easier for the long term. Interestingly, the research in this area indicates that about 10% of those who do get married should probably have waited longer before marrying or not at all. Using our Marriage Prep 101 Premarital Counseling Program to help answer the question of “should we or shouldn’t we” is entirely appropriate.
7. What are the goals or expected benefits of enrolling in the Marriage Prep 101 Premarital Counseling Program?
In creating Marriage Prep 101, we began by asking this very question. This is what we came up with and we continue to evaluate the workshop based on whether we are meeting these ten goals below:
- Affirm the strengths in your relationship
- Clarify the expectations you have for each other
- Assess your level of compatibility
- Understand the role of your family of origin
- Identify areas needing change
- Learn more effective relationship skills
- Avoid the traps of destructive interactions
- Enhance your emotional and sexual intimacy
- Manage personality and gender conflicts
- Create a marriage bond that offers a foundation for marital health and satisfaction
At this time, the program is only being offered virtually to couples on a 1:1 basis.
9. What is the cost and how do we register?
Considering that Michelle Joy, MFT will walk you through the entire program 1:1, observe your patterns together and offer insights, guidance and tools specific to your particular patterns as a couple – it’s very affordable compared to what she normally charges for regular couples therapy. Contact us at firstname.lastname@example.org for fee information, click HERE to learn more about our program, and click HERE to submit your deposit for enrollment.